Going Under
by blackrose21
Summary: *Complete* What if love could kill? A story about Ryou's love for an abusive Bakura. The rating is for some concepts in later chapters.
1. A violent prison

Going Under  
  
B(black)R(rose): Hey everybody, this is my first fic so please be nice when you review but  
  
I am open to all suggestions. If you have any please say so. I hope that the song I chose  
  
fits, (I think it does) the song is called "going under" (thus the title) by Evanescence.  
  
"Conversation"  
  
'thoughts'  
  
//song lyrics//  
  
Ryou-good  
  
Bakura-bad  
  
Chapter One: A Violent Prison  
  
//Now I will tell you what I've done for you  
  
50 thousand tears I've cried  
  
Screaming deceiving and bleeding for you  
  
And you still won't hear me//  
  
'He beats me, he lies to me, he controls me but I still love him. Not matter how hard I try  
  
to push him out of my mind I can't he is my other half, he is my love. He will never hear  
  
me I would never tell him, I can't. I don't know how much he would hit me, I don't know  
  
if he would be able to stop. I won't tell him.' A poor, shattered and beaten Ryou lay on his  
  
bloodstained bed, in his darkened room. Ever since Ryou had found that ring his life had  
  
been nothing but pain. He had not known true happiness since. Bakura, the spirit of the  
  
ring has beaten a defenseless Ryou. In-fact there is rarely a day that goes by that Bakura  
  
has not beaten Ryou. The only time that Ryou is truly safe is when his father is home and  
  
even that only keeps Bakura from hurting Ryou physically. Bakura still prays on Ryou's  
  
mind. Bakura lies and makes Ryou un-trust himself. Ryou's thoughts were interrupted by  
  
an alarming ring. "Agh!" Ryou's tattered body screamed in pain. Ryou reached over and  
  
slowly picked up the phone afraid of who is on the other end. "Hello" Ryou asked.  
  
"Hey, Ryou? It's me Joey."  
  
"Hi Joey"  
  
"Ryou!" An angry Bakura interrupted the two friends phone call. "Ryou, what  
  
have I told you about using the phone? You can only use it with my permission and with  
  
me on the other phone. Give me the phone!" Bakura snatched the phone out of Ryou's  
  
weak hand.  
  
"Hello?" Joey called from the other line.  
  
"Joey?" Bakura questioned.  
  
"Yeah it's me, is this Bakura?"  
  
"Ryou can't talk right now he is sick." That was a lie Ryou was not sick. Ryou  
  
was never sick like Bakura often stated. There was a small silence when Joey questioned  
  
Bakura and then Bakura mumbled an entire conversation to Joey on the phone, but  
  
Ryou's ringing ears could not hear what he said.  
  
"Oh, well I'll call him sometime later then."  
  
Bakura slammed down the phone, obviously furious at Ryou. "What so you think  
  
you were doing? Are you trying to piss me off? Because if you are..."  
  
Ryou cringed at the thought; he never wanted to make Bakura mad. His body  
  
ached at the thought. "No" Ryou mumbled "I would never..."  
  
"Don't blabber on you sappy child. You know that I hate that" Bakura interrupted.  
  
"I'm sorry" Ryou murmured.  
  
"You worthless little rat, don't try and get me to pity you. No one ever will. I'm all  
  
you have don't you understand? That was Joey calling to say that you two are no longer  
  
friends. He said that he can't have a weak friend like you, he said that when you're at his  
  
duels. You keep him from dueling his best because he said that he needs to 'keep and eye  
  
on you', he is right you need to be watched. You can't be left alone. If it weren't for me  
  
you probably would be dead by now. Don't you see? Without me you are nothing. You  
  
have no one."  
  
The small Ryou stared blankly in shock at the things Bakura just said about his  
  
friend. 'Is it true? Am I really holding Joey back? When Bakura gave me Yugi's letter,  
  
Yugi said the same thing. Maybe it really is true. Maybe I am too weak and really do need  
  
someone to depend on. No it can't be true!' "You lie!" The small child produced such a  
  
loud voice that it rattled not only the mirror but Bakura as well. Bakura was shocked at  
  
the small child's outburst; he immediately turned to face Ryou. Ryou soon realized the  
  
mistake in his protest.  
  
"How dare you! I am all you have, I look after you and care for you and this is  
  
how you repay me?!?" Bakura raised his anger-shaken fist and swung it at a small and  
  
terrified Ryou.  
  
//Tormented daily defeated by you  
  
Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom  
  
I'm dying again  
  
I'm going under  
  
Drowning in you//  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
BR: I'm really sorry that its so short but I just wanted to get something posted, I'll update depending on how many reviews I get. If not many people like it I don't know if I'll keep updating. 


	2. Ryou's decision

Going Under: Chapter two  
  
BR: hey people sorry it took so long to get this next chapter up, but I've been busy with  
  
final exams, anyway here is the next chapter...  
  
Random Lawyer: Uh-Um? *Glares*  
  
BR: What? I'm not missing anything  
  
Lawyer: A Disclaimer?  
  
BR: NO! I won't say it! *Runs around psychotically*  
  
Lawyer: *hits me over the head with legal papers*  
  
BR: Where did those come from?  
  
Lawyer: *Shrugs* Say it! Or I'll sure you for 4.6 million dollars!  
  
BR: O.o -okay, okay, *screams at top of lungs* I DO NOT OWN YU-GI-OH! Happy?  
  
Lawyer: No, I wanted the money.  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
//Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies  
  
So I don't know what's real and what's not  
  
Always confusing the thoughts in my head  
  
So I can't trust myself anymore  
  
I'm dying again //  
  
Ryou awoke to a world of pain. He reached over and turned of his painfully loud  
  
alarm clock. Last night had been extremely hard for him; he tried so hard just to not  
  
scream. Screaming only made things worse. It seemed like the tomb robber had taken out  
  
of his problems on Ryou's small body. After Bakura started screaming in ancient  
  
Egyptian he stopped listening to his insults. Trying to erase last night's memories Ryou  
  
got into the shower. The hot water poured over Ryou's body. The water awoke cuts and  
  
bruises that he didn't even know he had. Ryou discovered large scratches up his arms;  
  
'that was probably from Bakura trying to pull me downstairs. He was trying to get to the  
  
kitchen, but I don't want to be with Bakura when he has a knife. ... Why does he do  
  
this to me? I've never hurt or done anything to make him this angry. He says he does this to  
  
protect me, to keep me safe. Maybe his is right- no, he is right. He has saved me, saved  
  
me from my friends; all that friends do is hurt you. They lie and hurt you. That's it.  
  
Bakura is all that I have. And he doesn't even care about me. I love him so much and he  
  
beats me.'  
  
*Time passage*  
  
Ryou got out of the shower, slowly closing the steam covered door behind him.  
  
Ryou reached over and wiped off the mirror till the silver-haired youth could see his own  
  
sad reflection glooming back at him. Ryou locked the bathroom door with a click.  
  
Making sure that the way was clear he reached over top of the mirror and pulled down a  
  
cover-up make-up case. Ryou opened and began to cover up his bruises.  
  
After he was dressed and ready, Ryou went to grab his bag but it wasn't in his  
  
room. "Bakura, um ... have you seen my backpack?"  
  
"Sure, Abiou it's here in the living room" Bakura called.  
  
'He makes this house seem so normal, like nothing out of the ordinary ever  
  
happens'. "Thank you, yami" with that, a trembling Ryou grabbed his bag and left for  
  
another school day.  
  
"Hey Ryou!" A voice called from behind.  
  
Ryou turned around to see his welcomer, it was joey. "Hello, Joey".  
  
"Looks like your feeling better"  
  
Ryou looked at the blond youth puzzled. "Oh yeah" he replied going along with  
  
Bakura's lie.  
  
Suddenly Joey grabbed Ryou's arm "maybe you're not better".  
  
"Oh, those ... um" realizing what Joey was talking about the youth quickly came  
  
up with a lie to cover for Bakura "I'm fine. I just fell down the stairs last night".  
  
"Ryou, you know that you can tell me anything-"  
  
"Tell you what Joey?"  
  
'Oh god. It's Yugi' Ryou worried, and quickly began to show his nervousness.  
  
"I think that that Bakura guy is hurting Ryou" Joey proposed.  
  
"Ryou?" Yugi turned to Ryou in shock "is this true?"  
  
"No!" Ryou shouted in denial "Bakura loves me, he is protecting me, he would  
  
never do anything to hurt me!"  
  
"Ryou, bud. I just don't think that's true" the blonde insisted "Ryou he is hurting  
  
you!"  
  
"I've suspected but I wasn't sure-"  
  
"No! You're wrong you're both wrong! Bakura is protecting me-"  
  
"Protecting you from what?!? He is hurting you Ryou he doesn't love you, he  
  
doesn't care!"  
  
Those words hurt Ryou, 'can it be true? I just don't know! Is Bakura lying or is it  
  
my friends? No, they are lying. Bakura loves me! But why does he?' Ryou burst into tears  
  
trying to cope with his internal struggle of lies. He had to run. He had to get away. Get  
  
away from people. People hurt. People lied. Suddenly Ryou turned from his friends and  
  
ran in the other direction. A bag was hurled from Ryou's backpack as he spun.  
  
Yugi bent down to pick up the mysterious bag. "Ryou!" He called. Ryou stopped,  
  
surprised at his friends' outburst. "Ryou, what is this?" Yugi asked holding up a bag with  
  
a white powder substance inside. Ryou looked at the bag. He had never seen that bag. It  
  
was not his. But who would do this. Who would want to get him in that much trouble?  
  
"Ryou is that? Is that drugs?" Joey yelled in shock. Alarmed at Joey raised voice  
  
of the word drug a nearby teacher turned to face the three friends.  
  
"Ryou" the teacher called "come with me" she said grabbing the bag out of Yugi's  
  
hand.  
  
Ryou looked at the principal. He couldn't believe this. He was sitting in the  
  
Principal's office facing suspension.  
  
"Ryou, I have no choice" the deep voice boomed from behind his desk. "I have to  
  
suspend you for two weeks".  
  
Ryou gasped 'No!' "No you can't. You can't make me stay home. You can't leave  
  
me alone with him!"  
  
"Leave you alone with whom? Ryou, is somebody-"  
  
Ryou seemed to awake, like he was brought back to reality. He realized what he  
  
had shouted.  
  
"-Hurting you?"  
  
"No, sorry I just... uh... zoned out there for a minute"  
  
"Ryou are you sure?"  
  
"Yes" Ryou said with a depressing sigh.  
  
"Ryou, what took you so long? The school called over half an hour ago?"  
  
"Oh, sorry Bakura".  
  
"Don't oh, sorry ME! What are you doing? Drugs?!? Ryou what has-"  
  
"But I didn't! I swear"  
  
"Don't lie!"  
  
"I can't, I just can't" Ryou ran upstairs. He ran into the bathroom. 'I can't live  
  
with him. I can't live with him for two weeks! Two weeks in this house with Bakura. I ... I can't  
  
do this... I can't live my life this way anymore. I just can't live.  
  
// I'm going under  
  
Drowning in you  
  
I'm falling forever  
  
I've got to break through//  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
BR: Well if you can't tell where that is going than, well you need help. Next chapter is  
  
the end. It should be up pretty soon because I'm done school. Please Review Review  
  
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	3. A reflective end

Going Under: Chapter 3  
  
BR: This is it, this is the last chapter. I really hope that you guys like it. But I already know that there will be some Ryou fans made at me, I'm sorry. And to save the lawyers the trouble, I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh.  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
// I'm going under  
  
Drowning in you  
  
I'm falling forever  
  
I've got to break through//  
  
'Emotional teenagers' Bakura sat on the couch. 'Oh well its not like he is going  
  
anywhere. Ryou doesn't have anywhere to go no family, no friends and no more school'.  
  
Ryou pulled down the toilet seat and sat down on the plastic cover. 'Oh god, Oh  
  
god, what am I going to do. I can't go to school. I have no friends left they all think that I  
  
am doing drugs. I'm stuck here. Here on Earth. In my hell, with Bakura.' Tears welled up  
  
in Ryou's eyes. 'I'm stuck in this prison, with fist made bars'. Ryou stood up with  
  
tearstains covering his face. His fist shook in anger. Anger at the world. Suddenly Ryou  
  
pulled back his fist and hit the mirror with a crash. Hundreds of glass shards hit his face  
  
and fell to the floor. Ryou pulled back his fist in pain and held it against his chest. He  
  
looked down to see blood coming to the surface of his porcelain skin. Ryou picked up a  
  
piece of the broken mirror and looked at his reflection. A depressed, worry worn face  
  
looked back at him. His face had seen so much. So many hardships that most people  
  
never see in their entire life. Ryou had seen the pain of abuse. He dropped the mirror, it  
  
shattered when it hit the floor. 'It has to stop, this can't go on. I can't live my life in fear of the  
  
one I love.' Ryou turned on the radio.  
  
//Now I will tell you what I've done for you  
  
5o thousand tears I've cried  
  
Screaming deceiving and bleeding for you  
  
And you still won't hear me  
  
Don't want your hand this time I'll save myself  
  
Maybe I'll wake up for once  
  
Not tormented daily defeated by you  
  
Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom  
  
I'm dying again//  
  
Ryou turned the volume up so loud that he could feel the beat pulsating inside of  
  
him.  
  
//I'm going under  
  
Drowning in you  
  
I'm falling forever  
  
I've got to break through  
  
I'm going under//  
  
Ryou bent down and picked up a large piece of glass. 'Mirror, my one true friend.  
  
Please end my pain'. Ryou pulled the piece of glass against his wrist. Releasing warm  
  
blood. It washed over his wrist. Washed away the pain.  
  
//Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies  
  
So I don't know what's real and what's not  
  
Always confusing the thoughts in my head  
  
So I can't trust myself anymore  
  
I'm dying again//  
  
Ryou grabbed the mirror with his bleeding fist and continued to make a mirror  
  
image of the cut upon his other wrist. Releasing the sweet blood once again. Releasing  
  
him from his troubles, from his life.  
  
"Ryou!" Bakura shouted, trying to overtake the music coming from the bathroom.  
  
"Ryou, what the hell are you doing up there? ... Ryou don't make me come up there, you  
  
will live to regret it if I do!" When there was no answer Bakura got off the couch and  
  
stormed towards the bathroom fuming with anger.  
  
// I'm going under  
  
Drowning in you  
  
I'm falling forever  
  
I've got to break through//  
  
Ryou felt the pain of his wrists. He felt his pulse growing weaker. But as he was  
  
growing weaker he was growing happier. 'Finally, I'll be free' Ryou felt fait. His body no  
  
longer able to hold his weight he slid to the floor. 'I'm almost there, almost free of my  
  
love. But I wonder if he actually does love me, maybe my friends were right. How could  
  
he love me and hurt me at the same time. He can't love me.' Ryou had made up his mind.  
  
Bakura released his rage on the bathroom door. "Ryou! Open this door right now,  
  
or I'll-"  
  
'No, not yet, he can't find me like this. He can't save me.'  
  
//So go on and scream  
  
Scream at me I'm so far away  
  
I won't be broken again  
  
I've got to breathe I can't keep going under//  
  
Ryou let out a sigh of relief, he could finally breathe. He could breathe knowing  
  
that Bakura would never be the cause of his pain again. 'This is it' Ryou thought on the  
  
brink of death. 'It's over'. With that thought, it was over. Ryou's lifeless body let out it's  
  
last breath.  
  
As Bakura broke through the door the volume lowered. With only the music left  
  
playing. Bakura instantly saw the shattered mirror and the blood. 'BLOOD!' Bakura's  
  
eyes followed the blood to the floor, where he saw a blood stained Ryou. "RYOU!"  
  
Bakura shouted quickly kneeling to the floor beside the youth. Bakura went to look for a  
  
pulse and that's when he saw Ryou's wrists. 'Oh god' "Ryou! Wake up, Ryou wake up!"  
  
He was dead. Bakura was too late and he now knew this. Tears ran wildly from Bakura's  
  
eyes. "Ryou, Ryou I love you, wake up. I'm so sorry. I just wanted to protect you, to keep  
  
you safe." Bakura picked Ryou up and pulled him tightly into his chest. "Ryou, I'm sorry.  
  
I tried to save you pain and heart-ach and only drove you to hurt yourself. I love you  
  
Ryou, I really do" Bakura held Ryou's body and began to rock back and forth, as if trying  
  
comfort an infant. Bakura stayed this way long into the night. Crying, holding and  
  
rocking with only the music to comfort him.  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
BR: I'm sorry I killed him, I really am. Ryou is one of my favs. I'm also sorry that I wrote a Bakura/Ryou abusive fic. I realized after I started that there are a lot of them. But I just thought the song fit. Anyway please review I love getting your guys' reviews. And feel free to make suggestions. I also want to thank all of you who did review, I appreciate them all. Thank you. 


End file.
